As I graduated Senior High School , my mind fought whether to continue my studies or go get and find some job . But then it ended on my decision of continuing my studies . I want to be a professional someday and earn good salary as a pay back for all the sacrifices my parents have made . My journey starts on University of Mindanao getting the Degree of Bachelor of Science in Electrical Engineering . At first my journey became smooth and easy to handle , but then problems and struggles came , that’s when our first exam started . I was born and raised in a simple family who earned average wage . My fathers income just suit for our food and for our daily needs and it cannot support my studies financially , that’s the reality that I need to face and it sickens me . But then my father work hard , when our exam was coming he always advance his salary just to pay for my permit , that’s why during pay time he just earn half of his salary . I came up on a decision to stop schooling , but then my family keep motivating me to continue . I don’t want to see them struggling because of me especially when it comes to my brother and sister . Half of my fathers income goes to my study instead for my family needs , that’s why I keep pushing , I don’t want to failed them , I need to finish , I need to graduate and it Pressures me . I was afraid to fail on my subjects and getting it again next school year which means we need to pay for tuition again . I don’t want to waste the money that my parents sacrifice for me and its killing me . The fear of failing also eating me , that’s why I assured myself not to fail and I need to focus and advance my knowledge about a certain topic . But there are times that my brain can’t take it all . It always ending on me asking myself why i’m not enough and why my knowledge and learning are not enough for me not fail . The why’s and if’s where the reason I’ll breakdown sometimes , the insecurities , the fear , the tiredness is what all I feel .
Being a college student is not easy . You’ll find yourself into Ups and Downs , into Positivity and Negativity , into Confident and Fear . But the most important thing I’ve learned during my college life is that you need to value yourself first , and stop choosing on pressuring yourself . Choose the Positivity instead of Negativity , Choose to motivate yourself instead of putting it down . And the most valuable thing that Ive learned throughout my journey is that , You need to Stop thinking about the what ifs that may come as a result of your actions , instead start learning from your mistake and assuring them not to happen again. We always experience failing but a wise man can learned from the mistakes that he had made.
Sassy 